I Touched Ron Howard – A Child Is Corrupted

I Touch CelebsNot to say that I have corrupted my son Nate, but let’s just say that when it comes to touching celebrities, the apple doesn’t fall far from the corn stalk. Nate and I were spending a most delightful Saturday morning in New York City recently, talking politics, astral physics and the utter pointlessness of underwear, when a celebrity touching happened upon us. At the age of six, I was surprised that my son had never touched a celebrity (the Olsen Twins are NOT celebrities), but today was about to be his day.

Joining us in this touching adventure was Nate’s mother Jane, a hapless victim to our hyjinks. While we were enjoying our fritatas (that word is never not funny to me) at Sara Beth’s on the Upper East Side, in walks Ron Howard. You know Ron: Opie from The Andy Griffith Show, Richie from Happy Days and now and Academy Award-winning director. Well, Ron senses our star power and situates himself right behind Jane.

Now, Jane isn’t easily starstruck, so when I mention Ron Howard is behind her, she is nonplussed. Besides, she is wary that I might steal something off her plate if she turns around, which is a family tradition. Jane then decides to go to the bathroom to probably jump out the window. At this point, I execute my touch, which was an “Ooops, I dropped my fork with full arm graze of Mr. Howard on the upward return arch.” Text book really.

Touch secured, I returned to my German Pancakes. But then I think, wouldn’t it be grand for granny if I got a picture of Nate with Ron Howard? Well, of course it would be, so I ask Ron (I call him Ron) and he agrees. Nate and Ron huddle up and I get a great photo as Jane walks out of the bathroom, with a look of shock on her face… of course, not so shocked that she didn’t want a picture too!

We thank Ron and return to our meals. Here is where the old chip off the block starts chipping. About five minutes later… while we are savoring the last of our meals, Nate stands up, says nothing, walks over and taps Ron on the shoulder (ok, this does NOT count as a celebrity touch, because I am pretty sure that Mr. Howard realized he was being touched, by the maple syrup-covered fingerprints now on his shirt, but heck Nate is only six, so we will give it to him).

Nate asks Ron: “Mr. Howard, would you like to hear a joke?” “Sure!” “Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?” “I don’t know, why?” “He was looking for Pooh!”

Ron exclaimed “That’s a winner!” With that, Nate turned around, marched back to our table and polished off his apple pancakes. Nate has officially started his celebrity touching career.

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